Author Topic: Comedy Central Roast of... [CC]  (Read 6748 times)

Offline kerigan

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Comedy Central Roast of... [CC]
« on: 12 August, 2009., 13:25:38 CEST »
The Comedy Central Roasts are a series of celebrity roast specials which air on the Comedy Central cable network.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comedy_Central_Roast

kurenje Joan Rivers je bilo :s

sa gledam sa Pamelom Anderson  :D
Host: Jimmy Kimmel
Kuritelji: Courtney Love, Adam Carolla, Bea Arthur, Nick DiPaolo, Greg Giraldo, Elon Gold, Eddie Griffin, Lady Bunny, Lisa Lampanelli, Tommy Lee, Jeffrey Ross, Sarah Silverman, Andy Dick i David Spade.

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #1 on: 10 June, 2010., 00:10:04 CEST »
 International superstar and television icon David Hasselhoff has been announced as COMEDY CENTRAL’s next Roastee. The show is scheduled to tape this summer in Los Angeles. “The COMEDY CENTRAL Roast Of David Hasselhoff” will air on Sunday, August 15 at 10:00 p.m. ET/PT.
“I’m honored that COMEDY CENTRAL is going to get ‘Hoff’ on me,” said David Hasselhoff. “I have always been a major fan of Roasts, dating back to the days of the ‘Dean Martin Celebrity Roasts.’ Laughter is the best medicine. Bring it on! I’m ready to take the heat.”
“David Hasselhoff is a worldwide celebrity who has and continues to entertain audiences around the globe,” said Elizabeth Porter, senior vice president, specials and talent for COMEDY CENTRAL. “By the end of this year’s Roast, this pop culture icon will surely see that no slow motion run or life preserver can save him.”


E ovo će se gledat :rofl: :rofl: Držim fige da je Kathy jedan od roastera :D
 

Offline kerigan

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #2 on: 10 June, 2010., 21:37:48 CEST »
ako se barem 5 puta ne spomene onaj snimak na YT gdje je mrtav pijan mislim da nema smisla gledati :zubo:


Kathy :cheer: :cheer:

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #3 on: 08 August, 2010., 02:51:24 CEST »
Ima na homepageu Comedy Centrala sneak peek :zubo: Whitney Cummings :D :s


"Lisa, you look like Susan Boyle fucked Snookie." :roflmao: :lol: :lol: :s


Još tjedan dana :cheer: Od roastera koje sam vidio bit će, osim Whitney, Greg Giraldo, Jeffrey Ross, Hulk Hogan, Seth MacFarlane ( :cheer: ),  Pamela ( :D ) i Jerry Springer :D
 

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #4 on: 16 August, 2010., 15:47:33 CEST »
Ja sam PLAKAO od smijeha :lol: :lol: :s Nema smisla ispisivat sve one-linere jer ih ima barem sto :lol: :s

WHITNEY CUMMINGS i GREG GIRALDO :s :s :lol: Uvjerljivo najjači :lol: :top:

Šteta što ovog nema češće :D :s

EDIT: Skoro zaboravih, jeste primjetili njegovu kćerku Hayley, Amber iz Hugea? :D
 

Offline Franko

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #5 on: 16 August, 2010., 18:18:00 CEST »
Jadna Pam, bilo joj je neugodno :lol:

Whitney je bila zakon  :s

Pam, you're vagina is like a M. Night Shayalmann movie. 10 years ago everybody wanted to see it and now they look at it and say: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? :lol:

David Hasselhoff's dick is like a Polaroid picture. Nobody uses it anymore and shaking it doesn't make it appear faster. :lol: :lol:

Seth o Greg Giraldu: He's a judge on the show Last comic standing. A show that went one for 7 seasons and launched NOBODY :lol:

A Greg o Sethu: Donny Osmond, ladies and gentleman. He invented a show about a criminal baby. Just like Michael Lohan. :lol:

Hasselhoff, you drunk fuck. Your liver is so shrivelled, black and dead if your put your ear to the side you can hear: What'cha talkin 'bout Willis? OMG :lol:

I don't want to say David drank a lot, but his liver is so black and bloated it could've starred in 'Precious. :lol:




Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #6 on: 17 August, 2010., 15:26:12 CEST »
WHITNEYIN BLOG:

Here are the jokes from the Comedy Central Roast of David Hasselhoff that didn’t make broadcast that I did on Howard Stern this morning.

Seth mcfarlane. You’ve officially done the impossible. You’re a multi millionaire, you’ve created successful shows, you can help my career, yet I still don’t want to fuck you.

What a bunch of idiots. I haven’t seen this many dicks up close since pilot season.

Jerry springer, george Hamilton. Everyone up here is so old. I didn’t realize comedy central’s demographic was heaven.

Everyone is talking about how I gave sexual favors to be here. No. This is embarrassing. I’d blow someone to get off this show. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Jerry Springer? George Hamilton? I couldn’t blow anyone here if I wanted to–none of these men can get erections.

If I blew someone up here I wouldn’t be on comedy central I’d be on the history channel.

jerry springer, jeff ross, greg giraldo. This dias is so useless and gross, pam is probably going to try to fuck it it.

Jeff Ross.
 Jeff, why aren’t you successful? You’ve had so many chances to make it. Your career moves slower than lisa lampanellis metabolism. :roflmao: :roflmao: :ludilo:
 I wouldn’t fuck you if I was hulk Hogan and you were brooke Hogan. :eek: :lol:

 Lisa lampanelli
lisa, you spend all this time talking about how you have sex with black guys. Nobody is having sex with you. Your vagina gets hit less than jeff ross’s IMDB page. :rofl: :rofl: :s

 jerry springer
Everyone on your show is disgusting, ignorant, toothless, white trash. Basically everything pam needs to have an orgasm.

 Pam Anderson
 Pam and hoff worked together for a long time. You two are like a famous duo. You two are like Abbott and a slut with hepatitis.
 Pam, Your vagina is like the finale of lost: 10 million people have seen it, everyone was disappointed, and everyone who was in it died.  :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :rofl: :s :s :s
Pam its ironic that you’re an animal rights activist. If you love animals so much why don’t you boycott your leathery face.
Pam, You’re like kate gosselin. You’re a old, you’re  blonde, and you’re a fame whore. The only difference is the 8 babies that came out of your vagina were aborted. :eek: :eek: OMG :lol:

Hulk Hogan
I have seen your daughter, Brooke Hogan. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. No, I mean she literally looks like she fell out of a tree. :rofl:
Your daughter Brooke inherited a lot from you: her blonde hair, her tan skin, her dick.

Hoff
Hoff, you’re like george hamiltons dick. you don’t work. :roflmao: :ludilo:
You’ve spent years of your life on baywatch with pam Anderson, Carmen electra and yasmeen bleeth. If you don’t have genital warts, I think hepatitis c owes Tommy Lee an apology.
You’ve been around more herpes infested vaginas than a toilet at the kardashians house. :hehe: :lol: :s
David hasslehoff is such shitty actor that if there was a movie made about the life of david hasslehoff, the actor they’d hire to play him would be david hasslehoff.
Ive seen your music videos it seems like you’re trying to do an elvis thing with the swagger and deep voice. Too bad you didn’t go all the way with the elvis thing and have talent and kill yourself.
Hulk Hogan isn’t the only horrible father up here. hasslehoff has two daughters as well. Between the two of you you’ve brought more more dumb whores into the world than sarah palin.
 

Offline neo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #7 on: 31 August, 2010., 04:35:37 CEST »
sinoc mi pade napamet da ja ovo nijesam pogledao (ovaj sa hasselhoffom) tako da sam danas odmah skinuo i pogledao

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
kakvi su ovo ludaci :rofl: :rofl: genijalno.

Quote
Pam, Your vagina is like the finale of lost: 10 million people have   seen it, everyone was disappointed, and everyone who was in it died.  :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :rofl: :s :s :s
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :s :s :s zasto su makli ovo :rofl: :rofl: ovo je predobroo :rofl: :rofl:

inace na trenutke mi se cinilo da je ovo pamelin roast ne hoffov :rofl: :rofl:
speaking of which, skinuh i pamin roast, gledacu vjerovatno sjutra.

e da...pojma nemam ko je ova whitney ali je GENIJALNA :rofl: :s

My last day, I wear a metal uniform go around city killing criminals like robocop. Pow pow pow pow pow pow.

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #8 on: 31 August, 2010., 12:50:35 CEST »
Imaš i njen standup specijal Money Shot na netu, izašao je torrent :D Jest da mi to nije toliko smiješno ko njeni setovi na ovim roastovima :rofl:
 

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #9 on: 26 January, 2011., 18:39:09 CET »
"The COMEDY CENTRAL Roast of Donald Trump" - World Premiere

Sunday, 3/27 at 10:00 p.m.

 :D :D :D
 

Offline neo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #10 on: 26 January, 2011., 21:08:04 CET »
e to bi moglo da bude epic :s

My last day, I wear a metal uniform go around city killing criminals like robocop. Pow pow pow pow pow pow.

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #11 on: 26 January, 2011., 23:04:01 CET »
To će roasteri bit svih 8 starih Apprentice pobjednika koji su sad nezaposleni ili rade za neku desetu firmu :rofl:
 

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #12 on: 16 February, 2011., 18:45:37 CET »
Seth MacFarlane is turning roast hosting into a regular thing. Comedy Central announced the Family Guy creator will serve as roast master on its Roast of Donald Trump, which tapes March 9. MacFarlane becomes the first roast master to emcee back-to-back events for the cable channel. Last year, he hosted Comedy Central's roast of David Hasselhoff.

Moooože :D
 

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #13 on: 16 March, 2011., 11:09:19 CET »
Aaaa ja totalno zaboravio na ovo i onda vidim jutros na torrentu :cerek: :cerek: :lol:  PREZNOJIO sam se od smijanja :roflmao: :bonk: :bonk:

Seth MacFarlane je prezakon voditelj :lol: Kad je počeo govorit o nekome kog smo izgubili, jao očekivao da će reć Greg Giraldo, kad ono - Larry King died 10 minutes ago. :lol: :lol:

I kad je Trumpa najavio: THE SECOND WORST THING TO EVER HIT NEW YORK CITY :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :s :s When Trump bangs a supermodel, he believes he's jerking off :roflmao:

Larry King - chattering pirate skeleton on loan from Disneyland :zubo: :rofl:

Whitney Cummings can be seen in her summer show: How to succeed in business without swallowing? :rofl: :rofl:

Situation - Tonight is the beginning of his 15th minute of fame. :zubo: Don't clap he already has it. :s :s :lol:

I za Anthonya - he's here because Greg's dead. :zbunj: :lol:

I kako je Situationa oprao :roflmao:

Lisa Lampanelli - standardno odlična :D :s Kad je rekla Marlie - You read lips? What's my camel toe saying? :lol: :roflmao:

Najjači one liner joj je bio za Snoopa: IF I WANNA BANG A SKINNY BLACK MAN WITH BRAIDS, I'LL CALL ALICIA KEYS :lol: :lol: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Za Trumpovu kosu - I've seen better hair in Susan Boyle's taint :roflmao: I kad mu je rekla - you've ruined more models' lives than bulimia :rofl: :rofl:

I ofkorz - You've put up more hotels than an autistic kid playing Monopoly. :lol: :lol: :lol:


Larry King je isto bio solidan :D If you're 71% black, the you're 29%... not guilty. :lol: :lol:

Al Snoop je rasturio :D If you wanna fuck Lisa Lampanelli doggy style, all you gotta do is put a bowl of food on the floor. :roflmao: :lol:

Jeff Ross' mom shit during delivery, she thought she had twins. :lol: :lol: That's why he's so corny. :roflmao: :lol: :lol: :s

I'd like to fuck one of Trump's wives - just to know what it's like to cum into money. :zubo: :lol: :lol: Pa kad je Trumpu rekao za kandidaturu - It wouldn't be the 1st time you pushed a black family out of their home. :lol: :lol: :lol: :s

Whitney rastura :s :s :s Tako se nadam da će joj naručit pilot :D

Snoop - you speak worse English than Marlee Matlin :lol:

Za Trumpa - you should not have gotten her a diamond - now she knows what hard is supposed to feel like. :lol: :rofl: :rofl:

On The Apprentice - you've had NeNe Leakes, Brandy Roderick & Lisa Rinna - you've given more uneducated whores on-camera jobs than FOX News. :roflmao: :lol: :lol: :s

A KAKO SE SITUATION OSRAMOTIO :lol: :lol: :s To je bilo TUŽNO za gledat :roflmao: :roflmao: Kao neki kreten s Last Comic Standinga :lol:

Onaj Anthony likus je isto bio super :D  Jeff Ross has been roasting people since Whitney C. was nothing but a glint in the eye of the man who raped her mother. :lol: :lol: :roflmao:

Al zvijezda večeri - MARLEE MATLIN :s :s :s Neda mi se više ispisivat citate, ali ovo je bilo legendardno :zubo: :

As you can see, I'll be speaking with the help of my singer this evening, and, to be honest, I'm a little self-conscious of my voice  because I've been told by thousands of people that, when I speak, it sounds like Whitney Cummings with a dick in her mouth. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :s :s

I guess I'm the perfect choice for this roast because, like The Situation, I too have never heard the sound of laughter. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: KSSSS :lol:

Pa kad je pokazala znak za Whitney... I onda za Lisu :lol: :lol: :lol:

Lisa won best in breed at the county fair. :rofl: :rofl: I replaced her on The L Word. Apparently, the only way she would eat pussy was if it had french fries in it. :roflmao: :lol: 

Meni je ovo ULJEPŠALO DAN :lol: Ja se u životu nisam ovako smijao :rofl: :rofl: Zašto samo dvaput godišnje? :mama:

 

Offline neo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #14 on: 16 March, 2011., 12:58:41 CET »
sta ovo nije trebalo 27.03 premijera da bude?

idem odmah skinut :D

My last day, I wear a metal uniform go around city killing criminals like robocop. Pow pow pow pow pow pow.

Offline neo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #15 on: 16 March, 2011., 23:28:14 CET »
Genijalno :s :s :s :rofl: :rofl: tolko sams e presmijao ovih sat vremena da to nije zdravo :rofl: svi su odreda presmijesni bili :rofl:

dobro osim situationa, ono je bio jedan od najzescih blamova ikada :facepalm:

My last day, I wear a metal uniform go around city killing criminals like robocop. Pow pow pow pow pow pow.

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #16 on: 17 March, 2011., 21:18:04 CET »
Pojavila se na netu necenzurirana i PRODUŽENA verzija :zubo: :s Jebemti sad ću sve opet gledat :lol:

EDIT: Fak, to je za Hasselhoffa :zubo: A jbga, nema veze :rofl:
 

Offline ameo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #17 on: 19 March, 2011., 21:45:24 CET »
SETH:

Snoop, be honest,here, when you were backstage did you, did you, you know, blow Jeff Ross :D

it's pronounced i am f''' delusional, not,  i am running for president  :D

but if his plan  4 america is to  fire everyone he is about 2 years too late  :p

...to knock you down like the homeless shelter you destroyed on the way here

LISA:
look @ marlee - sitting up here, like she's normal

(2 Whitney Cummings):
people in this business hate you coz u're beautiful & thin.
not me. i hate you coz you're c**t

what do you say to a barber to get that type of haircut?
- I fxxxed your daughter*?*  :facepalm: :rofl:

(o Situationovoj knjizi):
Amazon said - customers who bought this book also bought rope & a stool.

Trumpu:
if you were broke you'd be f...ing me :rofl:


some people say whitney struggles with bulimia but i'd say she's actually pretty good @ it

2 donald trump > you look like Justin Bieber caught in fire
....

 :s :s :s :s :s :s :s it's also your last night, just so you know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D!!!!

Seth [nakon što je Situation završio]:
We'd wanna thank the Pope for that marvelous speech.
Holy sh**

Anthony:
 :s :s :s :s You've got a pimp, a murderer, a drug dealer, a pornographer, and then 8 white people.
 
Larry King is so old he's actually one of the jews that killed Christ  :D

Marlie Madeline - are u even listening 2 me?  :facepalm:  :D

Lisa Lampanelli  - you're cool.  :D

......

 :s :s :s :s :s MARLEE MATLIN  [kako je ta žena genijalnaaaa]

 :s :s :s :s :s  I guess I'm the perfect choice for this roast because, like The Situation, I too have never heard the sound of laughter.   :s :s :s :s

Jeff Ross
Larry king Live - even the title was an oxymoron  :D

he interviewed Moses...
he asked him if he thought the whole thing was a pyramid scheme.
 
Whitney Cummings is back again, some may know her for her porn name Whitney Cummings :D

Lisa's vagina is so beat up her nickname is Rihanna   :facepalm:

2 Situation > I hope that's just a sneaky way of deporting you :D

Doesn't it drive you crazy that you'll never build anything as high as me and Snoop are right now...

because i can't wait for assasina... i mean the inauguration.  :rofl:
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

a man who has everything except human emotions...

Donald Trump
#winning!

Lisa, I want you to be a judge for my next miss universe pageant - you're perfect coz like the universe you're constantly expanding
and filled with black matter.  :D

what's the difference between a wet racoon and Donald Trump's hair?
- - -  a wet racoon doesn't have 7 000 000 f'''' dollars in the bag!  :E


Svaka čast Donaldu Trumpu. It's all going to charity , and they paid a lot, believe me! :D


Dojam?
Ovo je zakon, idem skinut još!!!


Sometimes when we touch, the honesty's too much. And your screen gets smudged. No relationship is perfect, TV.





«·prevrtljivi, sadisti?ki mali djevoj?urak·»
I try to tell my friends this is a great movie, then they watch it and think I'm insane...

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #18 on: 09 May, 2011., 17:47:41 CEST »
NEW YORK, May 9, 2011 – COMEDY CENTRAL announced today that Kid Rock is set to join the likes of Donald Trump, David Hasselhoff and Pamela Anderson as COMEDY CENTRAL’s next Roastee.  During Kid Rock’s illustrious career as a performer, there has yet to be a single audience that could prepare the five-time Grammy nominee for the vicious onslaught of sharp barbs that will be thrown his way when he takes center stage for the “COMEDY CENTRAL Roast Of Kid Rock.”  The event is scheduled to tape on Sunday, August 14.

Meh, mogli su nać nekog boljeg :o :raspa:
 

Offline neo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #19 on: 25 June, 2011., 04:08:23 CEST »
Nije bas pravo mjesto, al da ne otvaram bzv novu temu ovdje cu.

Upravo odgledah stand up Lise Lampanelli Take it like a man.

I prekasno je i ne mogu citirat sve gluposti koje je rekla al moram rec da je ova zena ubjedljivo najveca kraljica od svih :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :s :s :s Genijalno, nacin na koji vrijedja sve zive al opet se svi smiju i prezabavno je....predobro :s

Ako nsite dosad...skinite ovo. Najboljih 59 minuta koje mozete provesti.

My last day, I wear a metal uniform go around city killing criminals like robocop. Pow pow pow pow pow pow.

Offline neo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #20 on: 05 July, 2011., 19:39:05 CEST »

My last day, I wear a metal uniform go around city killing criminals like robocop. Pow pow pow pow pow pow.

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #21 on: 05 July, 2011., 21:12:09 CEST »
I to još u premiere weeku :Slin: :s
 

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #22 on: 11 August, 2011., 18:49:36 CEST »
Comedy Central has tapped the acerbically funny writer-actor-producer to host the ceremonious roasting of the former Two and a Half Men star. To get an idea of what we’re in for, here is MacFarlane on his acceptance of the gig: “I’m very excited to work with Comedy Central again on the roast,” MacFarlane said. “Charlie is a true icon with a talent that is strong and pure and concentrated into small crystals which can be smoked or eaten. »


:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Jedva čekaaaam :lol: :s
 

Offline neo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #23 on: 11 August, 2011., 19:04:23 CEST »
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :s

My last day, I wear a metal uniform go around city killing criminals like robocop. Pow pow pow pow pow pow.

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #24 on: 29 August, 2011., 20:44:17 CEST »
The first wave of Charlie Sheen’s Comedy Central Roast-roasters has been revealed, and the brave men taking part in the festivities are Mike Tyson, Jackass‘ Steve-O, TMZ’s Harvey Levin, and comedians Jeffrey Ross and Anthony Jeselnik.

Jeselnik je rasturio na Trumpovom roastu :s :s
 

Offline Chmarin

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #25 on: 20 September, 2011., 16:44:40 CEST »
Meni je ovo bio najslabiji roast dosad :( Nisam se dvaput pošteno nasmijao :ne zna:

Jedino su mi Jeselnik i Amy Schumer bili dobri :D Falile su mi Lisa Lampanelli i Whitney :(
 

Offline neo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #26 on: 20 September, 2011., 16:47:45 CEST »
I meni je sve bilo nekako totalno...meh. mislio sam da je do mene jer sam poprilicno bunovan gledao,a l ocito nije :zubo:

Quote
Jedino su mi Jeselnik i Amy Schumer bili dobri :D Falile su mi Lisa Lampanelli i Whitney :(
Potpis. S tim sto je meni i Ross bio dobar :D
al sve u svemu...meh,.

My last day, I wear a metal uniform go around city killing criminals like robocop. Pow pow pow pow pow pow.

Offline ameo

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #27 on: 21 September, 2011., 22:18:21 CEST »
Jeselnik: Every moment of your life looks like first two minutes of LAW & ORDER SVU. :facepalm:   :lol:


Ross je bio super. Ne samo da je izroastao Sheena i ostale nego i cijelu tragičnu situaciju.


Ross: Anthony Jeselnik. Some are saying that you're next Greg Giraldo. Let's hope so.  :eek: :rofl:


Seth(nakon što je Steve-O izazvao Tysona):That's what it looks like when an asshole gets fisted, I guess. :rofl: :rofl:


Charlie: Till tonight I never realized how fucked up I was. All those time I thought I was just having fun. Yeah, It's true.
I've met  a lot of shady people over the years. Losers, drug addicts, dealers, desperate whores, but to have you all here on one night is really special. :D



Mislim da sam vidio Whitney Cummings u publici. Ili mi se to učinilo???
Sve u svemu bilo je malo ispod-prosječno, al' ok. S tim da sam potpuno preskočio Tysona, jer ko što je cura rekla, nitko živ ga nije razumio.
Ko da su doveli retardirano dijete da im pravi društvo.  :imslow: Katastrofalan potez.  :facepalm:

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Offline Franko

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Re: Comedy Central Roast of...
« Reply #28 on: 22 September, 2011., 21:51:50 CEST »
“You’re just like Bruce Willis. You were big in the '80s and now your old slot is being filled by Ashton Kutcher.” :rofl: :lol: